“Foundation” by Years & Years, Thursday, September 15, 2022 (Repost)

 

Olly Alexander grew up next to a church, and as a boy he was fascinated by the what he heard and saw from his home. His parents were not religious, but his impressions of the rituals that took place, during particular liturgical holidays sparked his interest in organized religion. However, as Alexander grew up in his sexuality, he came to realize that the church next door was not a place for him. He was still captivated by the symbolism of ritual. He sought community in gay clubs, which became like a church to him. If you listen to Years & Years albums, the themes of religion may almost trick you that you are listing to a Christian album.

I DON'T REALLY WANT TO BE FINE. The opening track to their debut album, 
CommunionYears & Years start their brand of Pet-Shop-Shop-Boys inspired electronica with an atmospheric, lyrically minimal track. However, it doesn't take a lot of words to convey the complex emotions in this song. And if you take the track with the highly symbolic music video, you'll have something to think about for a while. The video depicts Olly Alexander's funeral with a hypnotized audience. There are so many symbols calling back to nineteenth-century spiritualism. The song itself sounds like the calm before a storm on the edge of front. It gives me the feeling of the time when a sunny day starts turning ominous, just as the cloud start rolling in--angry clouds. Standing in a field when the first bolt of lighting strikes from out of graying sky. And just as the hail starts to fall, you make a run for it. It's the atmosphere of the dreams I had when I was young, storm clouds and being completely alone when the thunder rolls and the lightning strikes.

IF I TRIUMPH, ARE YOU WATCHING? Lyrically, this song makes me think about feeling unworthy of happiness. In my own life, I've tried to take the righteous path because I thought it would keep me holy. I felt that pursuing my happiness would lead me away from God. That's why I  chose to go to Seventh-day Adventist university, rather than a cheaper state school. I avoided people I thought would take me off the straight and narrow. However, in 2014 I couldn't put off my own happiness anymore. That year opened up my eyes and made me question the systems put in place to make me feel like I was afraid of the world. I often wish I had learned my lessons earlier. It would have saved me a few thousand dollars and maybe I would be on a different career trajectory. Then again, I want to think that I'm on the right path now, and I should just learn as much as I can. Love is possible. I should stop sabotaging my happiness.


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